Press Release: Proposed Graffiti By-Law Violates Freedom of Expression

Artwork by Faith47

As a collective of academics, artists and citizens we are concerned that the new, proposed graffiti by-law criminalizes all forms of public art and violates our personal right to freedom of expression on private property.

While this collective does not dispute the fact that vandalism such as tagging is costing the tax payer money that could rather be channelled into social development and uplifting the poor, we find it problematic that the by-law makes no distinction between vandalism and public art that is done with the permission of the owner of the property.

The by-law will soon be presented for public discussion and these are the two main issues that we feel need to be addressed:

1.The definition of graffiti under the by-law is too broad. It classifies graffiti as any inscription, word, figure, letter, sign, symbol, sketch, picture or drawing. There should be a clear differentiation between graffiti vandalism [e.g. gang tags, scratchings] and public art that is done with permission from the owner [murals, colourful characters and positive, inspiring messages].

2. The by- law removes the legal right of the private property owner to paint anything other than a house number on his/her wall. We strongly believe that the private property owner should maintain the right to determine what to paint on to his/her property without having to seek permission from the City.

Public art forms are an integral part of our social fabric and have a particularly significant place in the history of our struggle for a democratic and free nation. It is an accessible medium, which allows for social comment and creative expression for people from all walks of life. We urge the City to utilize and embrace public art as well as harness the potential for it to be constructive (rather than destructive) especially for the youth - and in turn, showcase the city as a creative hub to the tourism industry.

We urge the city to amend this by-law to become a more inclusive one and thus limit the damage it can potentially do to the creative growth of our city.

For any further information, please contact: Ricky Lee Gordon (Director of Write On Africa: Creative inspiration and Urban rejuvenation through special events, initiatives and Art in Public Space) on 083 3009970 or rickylee@writeonafrica.com

Many Africans, One Africa

The Crisis is now on our doorstep

KUK worked with The Filmmakers Against Racism in getting these videos together.

Lets debate this Crisis.

Free Zim! Kuk styles

Thanks to photographer Inge Prins for these photos.

'you don't want to get shot looking like an asshole'

When it comes to crime in South Africa, you rarely meet someone who hasn’t yet become a statistic. From smash-and-grabs to jackings – everyone has a horror story to share around the braai. Private security (never mind the insurance industry) is booming, so much so that suddenly its not doctors and lawyers that are sought after by aspiring brides. According to a leading women’s magazine, guys that install burglar alarms, even those with plumber’s cracks, have become hot property. Manufactures of bullet-proof vests have quickly sussed out that levels of crime have reached such epic proportions that its no longer safe for ordinary citizens to move about freely on the streets. In a twist of marketing genius, a manufacturer of bullet-proof vests has teamed up with leading fashion designers to come up with a vest that will not only save your life but ensures that you look cool in the event that you are shot at.

I asked Travis Anderson of the clothing label, Iron Fist, what he thought about the merging of cutting edge design with safety. “It's a necessary evolution because you don't want to get shot on the streets looking like an asshole”, says Anderson who is excited to be involved in the world’s first designer bullet-proof vest. “We had been working on similar projects with a group of African mercenaries who were looking for fashionable yet extremely functional genocide wear”, he explains. Local designer, Samantha Bulgin of Alfalfa clothing who has also come on board, agrees with Anderson: “Cross pollination is always good. Having beautiful objects around us is super important, why not extend that into objects of safety too?” Apparently, this is not Iron Fists’ first foray into safety-wear. “The trip line-detecting shuffle socks and leopard crawl leotard just never took off with the war torn mass market. I think we were just ahead of our time.”

Despite the fact that bullet-proof vests have so far only appealed to corrupt dictators and coked-up celebrities, Anderson is confident that it will take-off with ordinary, nobodies and that Iron Fist is the ideal label to kick start this designer/safety revolution: “Everything we've done this far has been incredibly un-politically correct so why stop there. Give me a call when you want to launch designer nooses and electric chairs.” Samantha Bulgin, who’s trademark designs include her sensitive drawings of proteas, hearts and keys, wasn’t as convinced about the idea at first: “I wasn’t sure what to think exactly, Alfalfa is about bright and happy not bullets and guns. But in terms of target market I’m sure this product will appeal to other creative people and their families.”

No Now that the idea has taken root in South Africa, will it expand to other poor, dangerous or war-torn countries like Brazil or Iraq? “Hell yes,” Anderson replies emphatically, “although a few necessary adjustments would have to be made like matching bullet-proof speedos for the Copacabana and a lightweight version for the desert.” And like any good marketing campaign, the support of celebrities is a crucial ingredient. “Charlton Heston's totally down and we're working on a pro-model with him”, reveals Anderson. “Other than that we're waiting for Slipknot's tour of the Middle-East before we kick off with the celebrity campaign.” As for Alfalfa, Samantha Bulgin is keeping her celebrity under wraps for now. “Alfalfa does have a favourite famous person who we think will be a great face and voice for this campaign, a South African, but nothing is finalised as of yet”, she says with a mysterious smile.

Encounters in the Fast Food Nation

He stands outside McDonalds, grinning, in the midst of locals selling pad-thai and iced watermelon on the infamous Khao San Road in Bangkok.
His palms are pressed together in an Asian-style greeting.
What is the icon of the fast food nation saying?
"Greetings, I'm here to colonise your country and your mind one Mcburger at a time"?

KUK Media Coverage

M & G Photos

"The kultural upstarts kollective, a Cape Town-based collective of cultural activists erected an installation commenting on the government's refusal to support those seeking reparations from multinationals who benefited/implicated in apartheid."

CTLive

"Cultural activists, the kultural upstarts collective (KUK) chose Day of Reconciliation (16th December) to highlight that the government is opposed to legal action that is being taken against multinational corporations that, allegedly, encouraged and furthered abuses during apartheid. In the latest endeavour to reclaim public space and blur the boundaries of activism and art, the kuksters crucified Steve Biko to St. Georges Cathedral. Literally. The installation, entitled 'Banking on Reconciliation' features a giant crucifix made up of the logos of all the multinationals being sued. KUK believes that for reconciliation to be achieved, the government has an obligation to work towards ensuring prosperity of all South Africans and condemn the injustices of the past and present."

Banking on Reconciliation? Opinion Piece for the Cape Argus

It did not come as too much of a surprise that the events around Polokwane would overshadow the meaning behind Day of Reconciliation. While the country geared (or rather braced) itself for the final stand-off between Zuma and Mbeki last weekend, the kultural upstarts kollective, a Cape-Town based group of cultural activists erected a 3.5m x 2.5m size crucifix outside St. George’s Cathedral and nailed Steve Biko to it. But even a public crucifixion of the father of Black Consciousness couldn’t divert media attention away from the Zulu on our stoep. Our latest public art installation was motivated by a strong belief that there cannot be adequate reconciliation without accountability and compensation for the suffering inflicted on South Africans under the apartheid regime. We chose Day of Reconciliation to highlight the fact that the government - of both Mbeki and Zuma - is opposed to the legal action taken against 23 multinational corporations for complying and benefiting from the apartheid regime.

A few weeks ago, in response to the news that the United States courts of appeal had overturned the dismissal of the apartheid lawsuits, Mbeki issued a statement that would harm both foreign investment and reconciliation, as well as undermine the State’s sovereignty. For the most part, Mbeki’s response attracted little media attention in the face of corruption scandals, fluctuating crime statistics and dirty politicking. In opposition to the government’s position, 17 Truth and Reconciliation commissioners, including Archbishop Desmond Tutu, have backed the Khulumani plaintiffs, who are taking legal action against the corporations. The kultural upstarts kollective feel it is a dishonour to all those (like Steve Biko) who fought and died in the struggle to overthrow an oppressive regime, for the government to believe that reconciliation has occurred simply because we now have a democracy. In his statement, President Mbeki declared that freedom and democracy are the “most fitting and profound reparation”. Tell that to South Africans who still do not have access to running water. Tell that to South Africans living with HIV Aids. Tell that to South Africans who are being evicted from their homes.

For us, as young South Africans, the struggle was not about ‘lip service’ ideals it was about addressing the socio-economic disparities that continue to cripple the majority of this nation’s peoples. We believe it is the obligation of the government to act as a conduit for the prosperity of all South Africans, as well as to condemn the injustices of the past and present, in order for true reconciliation to be achieved. The ANC’s ideological meander from a centre left movement to an institution which endorses macro-economic policies like GEAR are doused in neo-liberalism, on which multinationals, such as those being sued, thrive. In the context of the bigger, global picture where multinationals continue to exploit developing countries, it is disgraceful that the South African government is merely banking on reconciliation instead of using this case to highlight the unethical business practices that continue to pervade and contribute to the oppression of all African peoples.

Banking on Reconciliation? - photos

Photos by Julia Merrett and Greg Nicolson

SHAM/ANS

One of the occupational hazards I’ve come to accept as a writer is that you need to be pretty open to meeting a variety of people outside of your social radar and you have to be willing to embrace any experience – no matter how bazaar, annoying or surreal the situation you find yourself in may happen to be. On the whole, its part of what I love about being a writer, but when your week starts on a cold, rainy morning being greeted by a large bearded man wearing nothing but a toga, a whistle and a cell phone dangling from his neck, you just have to ask yourself: How bad can a desk job really be?

The man in question is a white sangoma who runs shaman workshops, and on the recommendation of someone whose opinion I usually value, I decided to go and see for myself if he was a shaman or just a sham. Trying really hard not to let the fact that his last name is made up of ‘mal’ and ‘titz’ feed my already healthy appetite for cynicism, I paid up more money than I would have liked to, took a deep breath and signed up for a three-day sojourn into the shamanic underworld. In retrospect, I wish I had trusted my instinct when it comes to judging people by their names. I lasted until lunchtime. Aside from the mish-mash of aliens, chakras, angels and crystal slop that is usually served up at these kind of workshops, I had the pleasure of witnessing him remove an alien out of someone’s back. Now that’s something you don’t see everyday, hey? When I was the only one in the room who couldn’t ‘see’ or ‘feel’ the alien, the mal pip then turned on me. He pulled a dragon out of my body, which he then trapped in a crystal and told me that now people would be less afraid of me. Who does this guy think he is anyway? This is South Africa, I feel safer knowing that people are afraid of me for a change. And what if I liked my dragon? First he removes it without my permission and then traps the poor little fellah in a crystal like a cockroach in a glass jar. Needless to say, the mal pip didn’t really appreciate the comparison.

As if he wasn’t annoying enough, don’t even get me started on the rest of the group. Apart from the usual middle-class, Odyssey-reading, holistic-going, aura-cleansed and colonically-irrigated types that have nothing better to do with their money or time, there was an American woman about my age who wasn’t satisfied with my performance when it came around to my turn with the pendulum. When I told her to give me a break and that it wasn’t my fault that the piece of bees wax tied to the end of a string wouldn’t move over any of her chakras, she asked to switch partners. What I did learn though was that homosexuality is not a personal lifestyle choice as I had always assumed, but is in actual fact caused in men by the presence of a parasitical female spirit who wants some action and the only way she can get it, is to attach herself to some poor unsuspecting man. Presumably, if you’re a lesbian then you’ve been invaded by a horny male spirit. But what happens if you’re a woman occupied by a lesbian spirit? The mal pip didn’t seem to want to answer that question.

Wait, it gets better. These pesky spirits are also responsible for alcoholism. Apparently, despite it being referred to as the spirit realm, its pretty hard to get hold of a drink out there, so what these guys do is hitch a ride with a living body so that they can down a cold brewski and shoot tequilas with their mates. When I remarked that this must mean that impoverished areas with high levels of alcoholism must all be haunted, the mal pip announced that we were going to break for lunch. He didn’t even answer my question whether he had met any spirits that are partial to jeigie-bombs?

shop less, live more

The Revolution Will Be Televised

This year marks the 16^th internationally celebrated Buy Nothing Day. On 24^th November, millions of people around the world stand together and refuse to spend. Refuse to participate. Refuse, for just 24 hours, to feed into a self-perpetuating system that exploits, oppresses and depresses. Everywhere around the world – except in South Africa, that is.

In a recent interview, the U.K. performance poet Benjamin Zephaniah said that he wants to start a revolution but all his friends are too busy having sex or shopping.

I know exactly what he means.

Corporate branding has devoured counter culture, re-packaged it and sold it right back to us. What began in the early 1990’s on the international front has recently taken root at home. Corporate captains and hunters of cool are targeting the most lucrative generation of consumers, us. For the so-called ‘born-free’ youth, the struggle is over. We are a generation more pre-occupied with getting a good job and joining the ranks of the middle-class than social activism. We are a generation that has seen our freedom fighters turn into martyrs, politicians or managing directors. It hasn’t taken long for the marketing guys to figure out that we are too clued up to be taken in by the empty promises of politicians or outdated anti-establishment rhetoric, but we still, like every generation that came before us, yearn for a revolution.

Taking advantage of this political vacuum, the boardroom has gone underground to create brands that have resonance with youth (sub)cultures. Tobacco companies throw ‘underground’ parties, trance-heads knock back tequilas at the bar that ‘gives you wings’, and skaters are mobile billboards. Nothing has been left un-branded, not even our social conscience. Corporate sponsors are quickly realising the potential of associating themselves with causes that bring together a cross-section of youth subcultures from Punks to Heads. Hijacking issues such as H.I.V. and poverty, the executives of cool sponsor events which, probably cost a fraction of their marketing budget and, as a charitable events, are most likely even tax-deductible. The danger of this kind of branding is that young people are duped into associating certain brands with social resistance and are lulled into a sense of complacency that wearing brands that merely symbolise your politics is enough.

Maybe Gil Scott-Heron was wrong, it looks like the revolution will be televised.

Making Rhinos out of Fiction: for Ronny and Willie and Addy*

*my childhood nickname


“He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster” Nietzsche

Fiction on Long Street and the Rhino pub in Tarkastad have little in common. Fiction at first appears genuinely alternative, but a second glance confirms its place in the ideological mainstream. It simmers with Cape Town’s homogenous, post-punk trendoids, who place the city’s ‘underground’ scene firmly at ground level. Fiction’s women’s day posters of tomb-raideresque, bikini girls, illustrate its support of the general status quo.

By contrast, the Rhino pub of Tarkastad (between Queenstown and Cradock) opts for art-deco retro fascism: its pub theme not being Irish cosiness or sporting heroism, but Apartheid. Pictures of pin-up boys Paul Kruger and Hendrik Verwoerd line the walls, poets can enjoy the flowing libretto of ‘Die Stem’ displayed behind the bar, while those with a keen eye for aesthetic panache can scan the ceiling’s South African Sistine 5m X 5m Vierkleur old South African flag.

For me, these contrasting watering holes are connected due to consecutive week ends in August, when I succeeded, at 27 years of age, in making my fisticuffs debut at these two venues. First, with Ronald Suresh Roberts at Fiction and then with Willie Liebenberg, owner of the Rhino.

I (Addy), confronted Monsieur Roberts (Ronny), telling him that his ‘native intelligence of Thabo Mbeki’ and support for the dismissal of the Deputy minister of health offended my left leaning sensibilities. He unexpectedly punched me, I rugby tackled him. I was escorted from Fiction. Monsieur Liebenberg (Willie), initially suspicious when myself and 5 friends entered the Rhino, then conceded that he would add Mandela to his wall of pinups if we donated the portrait. But when Addy in drunken bravado, tore down 1 of the 5 or so old South African flags, Willie went to retrieve his baseball bat, from when, I assume, the Tarkastad Tornados had major league status. I survived, this is the tale.

I had hoped this piece (an attempt to resolve my little quarter life duelling crisis) would unpack the ‘who exists for whom’ in the uncanny smorgasbord that is South African multi-culturalism: Is Ronny the product of Willie’s racism? Are Willie and his bar the result of Afrikaner alienation due to Addy and Ronny’s self-righteousness? Is Addy the middle-class, DSTV watching pseudo-Lefty, authenticated by Willie’s conservativism and Ronny’s new black elitism?

Let’s rather twist the Rubik’s to expose one of its shadowed facades. Addy and Ronny and Willie represent certain forms of brittle South African masculinities whose honour is uncertain and shame easily aggravated. Cross-cultural masculinity’s most common characteristic is honour or respect, something which is never attained and is always contested and desired. To add to this notion of honour, violent exchanges almost always involve the threat of shame. These issues of honour and shame are pertinent in the South African context. Afrikaners are too easily branded the only villains of Apartheid. Black intellectuals supporting Mbeki are often called sycophants and elitists, while white middle-class lefties are left tenuously disorientated in a world of multi-national capitalism and affirmative action.

This elusive ‘honour’ and lurking shame produces defensiveness and paradox amongst men in general and South African men in particular: the more they assert themselves the more they call themselves into question. Addy and Ronny and Willie attempt to claim recognition and legitimacy through the different masculine South African narratives they contrastingly position themselves within. But these narratives are tentative because of the history of this country and the way it has divided groups of people and because the future seems hazy. Threatening these uncertain masculinities can easily lead to conflict and violence when honour is at stake.

But the coliseums for settling these disputes should not be Fiction or the Rhino and the means of engagement should not be fisticuffs. Despite our high Gini co-efficient, ethnic heterogeneity, colonial history, lax alcohol laws, prison system and rates of single parenthood, South Africa still has higher rates of crime and violence than countries with similar structural conditions. Perhaps this is because we have certain forms of socially learned, volatile and uncertain masculinities, produced by our collective history and the way it has divided groups of people. These forms of being men negate dialogue and compromise in political circles, social settings, schools and homes. Social change does not come about through mindless violence. It requires a combination of brave action and intelligent consciousness expanding. It also requires reflection, asking questions and the ability to be self-critical. If Addy and Ronny and Willie want to become heroes, they need to learn to listen, think before they act, breathe deeply, accept criticism and reinvent forms of South African masculinities that serve as peaceful and empathetic role-models for the next generation of South African men.

Saturday Argus article

This article appeared in the Weekend Argus on Saturday, October 13 2007.

Many thanks to Julia Merrett for these pics!

Opinion piece featured in the Argus

On the afternoon of Heritage Day, the kultural upstarts kollective transformed the statue of Cecil John Rhodes at the University of Cape Town, taking inspiration from the colourful and distinctive outfits of the nation’s soccer supporters. The motivation behind this installation was to challenge the idea that heritage belongs to a static past and to show that, instead, heritage is inextricably bound up with the process of looking back as the nation moves forward. Through such an initiative we hoped to communicate, in a creative way, that heritage is how we imagine – and locate – ourselves in the present. Although we were granted permission by the University our project was met with vehement criticism by DA ward councillor, Owen Kinahan.

After seeing an article about us in the Argus, Kinahan wrote a letter to the vice-chancellor objecting to the installation for two main reasons: firstly because I had been arrested for defacing public property. In 2002 I stencilled an image of a spray can along with the words ‘Free Art’ on an N2 bridge in protest against the barrage of proposed by-laws that boasted a “zero tolerance” approach to all the City’s social ills by banning everything from graffiti to the homeless. As I was a middle-class, white and supposedly upstanding member of the community this little escapade received a lot of media attention and fuelled the debate around the short-sightedness of Draconian laws that threatened to turn two already marginalized groups into criminals: the youth and the poor. People begging and living on the street are a symptom of poverty and graffiti is the voice of the youth refusing to be silenced. The protest was not just about graffiti, it was about demanding to know why our leaders were not providing viable, long-term solutions to uplift the communities that need it most. No wonder they were threatened by the writing on the wall. A few weeks after the arrest, amidst raging debate about graffiti and youth culture, Diesel did not miss the opportunity for some guerrilla marketing, and their signature back-to-front ‘E’ began appearing on the walls of the city. There were no objections from Kinahan or any other councillors for that matter.

Secondly, Kinahan objected to the Heritage day installation because he regarded it as an immature act of anarchy rather than activism or art. In his letter, he stated the following: “While I have no problem with pranks that dress up statues from time to time, I have a real issue with the likes of Delle Donne practising "activism" on the UCT campus for their own anarchical reasons. It is one thing for them to get involved in a mature debate WITH the University about its heritage but quite another to behave in this manner.” What I find most amusing about Kinahan’s statement is that it is, if nothing else, a dazzling display of ignorance and narrow-mindedness when it comes to the notion of public art. How can someone hold public office and still think that art only belongs in a gallery and therefore anything outside of that platform could not be construed as a mature act of creative engagement with the notion of heritage? More to the point, does Kinahan, as a ward councillor, not have more pressing issues to deal with?

Currently, many Cape Town streets are being considered for renaming in an attempt to erase certain elements of the apartheid legacy. As part of the process of transformation, many of these public spaces can be renamed, in so doing re-constructing our champions and values to fit more congruently with contemporary democratic South Africa. Street names can be dealt with fairly easily, as can names of airports and other physical locations. But what about statues? These more heftily spatial, weighty and personified symbols of the past are difficult obstacles to deal with. Destruction or removal seems to be an unsatisfactory cop-out that lacks both creativity and attempts to obliterate people who have left their mark in ways that go deeper than the statue itself. So what do we, as ordinary South Africans do about statues which form part of our colonial and apartheid heritages: the concrete figures that seem somewhat out of place in the contemporary democracy? Although events and people cannot be erased, they can be reshaped and resignified to cast different shadows. While I found Kinahan’s response amusing, it is also alarming because it smacks of elitism and limits the possibility for individuals and communities to explore heritage as a complex cultural resource which we all can lay claim to in empowering and meaningful ways.

More News

This article appeared in the UCT Monday paper. Read about it here

And the winner of the worst idea for 2007 is.................

Usually, around this time, I like to take stock of what the year has brought so far. We’re over the half-time mark in the game of 2007, 3 years away from the soccer world cup, 5 years away from the end of the world if you follow the Mayan calendar (I can’t shake off the feeling that somehow these two events are connected), and 43 years away from completely depleting the earth’s supply of fossil fuels. My new year’s resolution for 2007 was to take up a hobby. People have told me it relaxes you so I’ve been giving it a go. I heard that some people collect stuff like stamps which, initially, sounded pretty easy going to me as a first stab. My only problem is that having a hobby isn’t proving to be as relaxing as I thought it would be, especially when you're collecting the worst ideas of 2007.

So far top of my list are the crew of Chinese scientists who have successfully created the first artificial snow by seeding clouds with particles of silver iodide over the Qinghai-Tibetan plateau. Tibetans have really got it rough, first they’re occupied by the Chinese at gunpoint and then they’re showered with artificial snow! Apparently because the glaciers are melting, freshwater lakes in the region are drying up faster than you can say chop suey so Chinese scientists are celebrating the fact that they’ve found the solution to global warming. Hooray! Much easier than cutting down emissions. Go China! Keep producing all that stuff that WE keep buying. Second place was a tie, so you’re going to have to be the judge. In the right-wing….I mean right-hand corner we have Juan Jose Daboub, the managing director of the World Bank, who is rumoured to have links with a Roman Catholic sect and has ordered all references to family planning to be removed from Madagascar’s assistance programme document. I mean come on Juan, are the words “developing country” and “reproductive health” not synonymous in your vocabulary? There are 75 million unplanned pregnancies a year and third of which are dealt with by resorting to unsafe abortions. Are you going to confess to that next time you in the confession booth, Juan? Something tells me you’re going to have to say a whole lot of Hail Mary’s to get out of this one.

In the other right-wing corner (and this time I mean right-wing) weighing it at a trillion pounds, we have the majority of French fascists who voted for Nicholas Sarkozy as their new president. Not only is he planning to cut social services but plans to make life even harder for Arab and African immigrants than it already is in la belle France. I guess what can you expect from a man who believes that deviant and criminal behaviour is genetically determined making some races more predisposed to such behaviour than others? Sorry readers, no prizes for guessing which races he’s referring to. Next up is the U.S.A.’s National Rifle Association who has come up with a sure-fire winner solution to the reoccurring problem of All-American psycho kids emptying bullets into other kid’s heads before turning on themselves: arm the teachers, the Virginia shootings would never have happened if one of them had a gun. Great! What is this, the Wild West? One minute your old math teacher is scribbling algebra formulas on the board and next thing he’s Rambo crouching behind the desk locked in a shoot out with the captain of the football team.

Brace yourself peeps, the next one is pretty gruesome and it involves pigs. By the end of the year, the U.K. wants to convert to a biofuel made out of pig fat. Pretty ironic considering a recent UN report which states that the meat industry is responsible for more global warming emissions than all the cars, trucks and planes in the world put together. This is an ideological minefield, as you can imagine, its got animal rights activists and vegetarians up in arms. Jews and Muslims are freaking out but maybe it’s great that they can join forces against a common enemy. Now that I’m thinking about it, could a pig be the solution to the Middle East crisis? Are you relaxed yet? I’m not. Do you think it’s too late in the year to get myself a new hobby?

Live Earth, a Convenient Truth

I’m sitting on what, potentially, could be the worst flight in Mango’s short history. My travelling partner and I arrived at Jozi airport in the knick of time only to discover that we’re not on the same flight back home to Cape Town. We say our farewells and I head off to find a Kauai smoothie to drink and a Sunday Independent to bury my head into for the next hour and a half or so. At the boarding gate, a fellow passenger tells me that the plane has been delayed by an hour. He is furious – apparently this is the third time he has been delayed by the previously mentioned airline. Now I’m stuck in the purgatory they call the departure lounge. Faced with the ethical dilemma of having to choose between Wimpy and Nescafe’s coffee I choose Wimpy because I just can’t bring myself to support Nestle whose tactics to get mothers in the “Third World” to feed their babies powder instead of breast milk rivals that of the cocaine industry. I’m now finally on the plane, and still there is no God.

I’m sandwiched between two screaming kids. Two! What are the chances? I am really regretting my decision not to order a whiskey when the refreshment brigade came around. What makes matters worse is that the co-pilot hasn’t instilled much confidence in me. She first announced that we would be landing in Joburg and then corrected herself (with a giggle, nogal) and confessed that she was a bit “confused”. Geez Louise sister, you can’t joke about shit like that in a post 9/11 world. Anyway, I’m starting to get the feeling that this is definitely a case of instant karma kicking in. I cast my mind back to a few weeks ago, when a free ticket to Egoli together with a comp for the Live Earth concert landed in my lap. Don’t get me wrong it wasn’t all plain sailing. I first had to endure a mental wrestling match between the activist and the self-serving writer that reside in my head. The activist pinned the writer down with the carbon footprint issue and the incongruity of flying to a huge music concert to raise awareness about global warming. The self-serving writer had no choice but to resort to some pretty dirty tactics which I can’t, in the interest of maintaining some degree of privacy when it comes to the workings of my innermost psyche, go into. Three minutes and 40 seconds into the wrestling match, the writer was declared the winner. Needless to say, that it’s the activist who is now getting the last laugh and while I sit typing on my laptop, is smugly telling off the writer that this rotten Mango is payback for having supported the biggest corporate greenwash event of the millennium.

At the concert, watching all the punters devouring their hot dogs and slurping their Cokes I wondered how many of them could define ‘carbon footprint’ let alone are aware of the fact that the meat industry generates about 18% of the world’s greenhouse gas emissions – that’s more than the transportation industry. I mean, does Al Gore really think that a heavily branded concert filled with musicians telling people to only boil the exact amount of water they need for their cup of afternoon tea is really going to make a difference when what we need is a radical shift from the business as usual mindset? If change, real change is going to happen people need to be challenged and they need to feel part of a global movement as activists rather than consumers. Also, is the Live Earth concert symptomatic of yet another way in which local responses and solutions to Africa’s problems are being hijacked by the West? Given the problems that Africa is grappling with, do we really need the rich and famous to put on yet another “Live 8” type concert which incidentally, did little in the way of providing debt relief? It’s hard to escape the irony of Al Gore, representative of a country which refuses to sign the Kyoto agreement and is the biggest contributor to carbon emissions, spending millions on an expensive, environmentally damaging event to raise awareness about global warming here in the “developing world” where Africa’s carbon footprint ranks amongst the lowest in the world. Speaking of climate change, we’ve just hit some serious turbulence. It looks like the Live Earth concert came at a price after all.

Article featured in the Cape Argus

Read the article here